What is the Normal?

The recent protests are a signal that we will no longer accept what has been thought of a normal state of existence in this country. There is no normal, never has been for marginalized individuals.  George Clooney made a statement posted today, saying that our greatest pandemic is anti-black racism. I would say it the pandemic is racism period. It has sickened democracy and infected us with a terminal racism that is killing our country and planet.

Do we really want to return to normalcy?

I was recently reading about what Warren Harding did after the pandemic of 1918 and WWI. He took office in 1920 facing the remains of WWI and the Spanish Flu Pandemic. He presented ideals that satisfied what upper and middle economic citizens thought to be normal. As disease and war fears subsided the population erupted into the Roaring Twenty’s age of jazz, flappers, and the diminishing restrictive Victorian Society.  Society Changed but not for the better for the ill, under privileged, the marginalized citizens.

In the background of the jubilant noise, voices of caution were drowned out. There were warnings about financial disaster. No one heard the message, in a context where they were moved to try to resolve the coming disaster. This disaster created more than just a financial loss of those invested. It created a loss of jobs, home, health, and families. Then like now there was a drastic increase in suicide across all spectrums of society.

In Greek mythology, Cassandra was the daughter of the King of Troy. She was so beautiful that the God Apollo granted her the gift of seeing the future, prophecy. When Cassandra spurned Apollo’s love, he put a curse on her – that no one would believe any of her predictions. Cassandra was thus an epic and tragic figure – granted a powerful ability, yet powerless to use it. Throughout history there have been many Cassandra-type figures, people who predicted the coming of terrible tragedies and disasters, but whose warnings were ignored.

The myth of Cassandra lives in our collective unconscious mind. We are living in a time that Casandra myth is active, and many are not believing the warnings including the leader of our country.

There are those, thru the last 100 years in the USA, who have predicted all kinds of disasters, which have been ignore, or rather not taken seriously. We have been warned early return from quarantine for the COVID-19 virus, may mean more deaths, leading to more financial strain. But it means more than loss financially. It means that those with the least, the marginalized, will suffer more.

Daily we are hearing the want to return to normal. And what does normal mean? It means that many will be without medical insurance or ability to access health care. It also means that these same marginalize citizens will remain caught in the same furrow that has been dug for them through history. It also means the richer will becomes wealthier. As in the early 20s the middle class bloomed, today the new millionaires, as the neo-middle class, will continue to bloom in the same manner. We have now more than one level of poor. We have poor, and poorer and those with nothing to survive on. Which means there is less and less options, for those without financial clout as insignificant classes to use for survival.

Return to normalcy? To have white police people shoot and kill African Americans without cause, have homeless line our streets, to have millions suffer with disease and hunger, and have an inability to get a job that pays enough for minimal living. Normalcy means continue with a declining environment that will crucify our citizens, except those in the upper 5% financially, the rest of their lives and the generations, ad nauseum. Normalcy to put a sign in your car that says “my freedom is more important than your health? Normalcy where are leaders incite violence, have no real intent of helping those who most need our help. Normalcy where we ignore health warnings and let our own selfishness overwhelm hospitals and others die.

Of course, the families who are starving about to be homeless, give-up their cars, and have no healthcare options; have little real ability to address what normalcy means. The chaos that ensues when we ignore warnings, the loss and long-time scars are not what I want to return to. And perhaps not so important but educational cost so high that we grow a class of super indebted students, and another slave labor class that can barely read or write.

We need to re-think our economic system, education, and address the prejudices we carry deep in our conscious mind. No, I don’t want to return to normal.

© Suzanne Deakins 2020                                                                                                             Coming soon, A Journal During Pandemic


Where is the line between rationalization of violence, and equal justice?

There is no ONE answer to what is happening now. The riots, anger, and feeling of being held down, are a trigger to rioting not the causer. The causer is the continuing of the inhumane treatment of all marginalized people. African Americans are only the latest focus. They have been held in physical and financial slavery for 300 years. We need conversations at all level of society on this inequality that is so imbedded in our consciousness and society.

Laws don’t change inequality; laws cannot change society as a whole. Change comes from individuals taking a long hard look at our own inner prejudices and coming to terms with our deep seeded fears and triggers. The riots of May 2020 are society, our country calling out we cannot live like this… we cannot breathe.

See Heather Williams upcoming Translation Class for a technique to help you deal with your prejudices hidden deep in consciousness. Email me at onespiritpress@gmail.com for more information.

The Disease-of-Loneliness

My question about the current Pandemic of COVID-19 was what did we know historical about pandemics? What else happened to individuals besides being sick and dying?

All pandemics have several things in common. First, they spread quickly when an area is congested, 2nd, they kill, and 3rd, create a basic cure that causes a second pandemic. The self-quarantine necessary to bring the death under control causes loneliness. Loneliness is a bigger disease than diabetes, smoking, and heart disease. It has as big impact on our well-being as any bacterial or viral disease.

To connect with touch others is as much a biological imperative as food and air. Science, (in an actual study in America), is beginning to recognize that more people die from loneliness than ever before, in the last 20 years the death rate has doubled. It answers the question of why so many would not see the importance of staying quarantined and be willing to go into gatherings that could infect them and others? They have food and air, and are not sick with the virus, but are dying from loneliness. The need for contact is as great as it is for air. It is estimated that 1 out of 5 appointments with physicians is based on loneliness. A senior has a 45% increase in mortality if they are isolated.

Before 1800 there was no word loneliness. The word alone existed as meaning only one, but the word loneliness which bares an emotional connotation did not exist in language. There was a meaning of alone for being by-ones-self and a lonely place.  Most of the world’s population lived in multi-generation family homes and small communities. Being lonely and missing meaningful, non-sexual touch, was not a problem. Intimacy of contact was built into our society before the early 20th century.

Being in quarantine, living alone, are not the sole causers of loneliness. As many know they can be in a crowd or talking on the internet and still feel lonely. Loneliness is a separation of the whole being of an individual. Starting in the late 19th century schools, churches, and government separated the body, mind, and emotions. Seeking to better understand the individual aspect of a person. Metaphysicians and existentialist such as Jean-Paul Sartre anguished at seemingly degradation of the whole being, as science, began to look with a microscope at the components of individuals. Philosophy sought the soul, the God of an individual. But neither can be found in one aspect of a person.

Without an intuitive knowing of a sense of soul and creator source (God), an individual falls into a state of mortal existence, where they are faced with the physical decaying of life. During a time of separation these feelings increase. Facing mortality is a lonely time for anyone and facing for weeks at a time as the world has done, is truly heart-wrenching.

We have learned what the elements of an atom do and their effect on a molecule. But, unlike Chinese/Ayurvedic medicine, we have not learned that you cannot have a working whole being without all the parts working as unit. The cure for loneliness can only occur when the healer approaches the individual in a wholistic manner.

Loneliness is a backdoor disease being brought on by a lack of knowledge of the body-mind-emotional connections.

 We have divided the self, body from mind. We regulated emotional needs to the mind rather than seeing the effect on the whole being. As we left the villages and the multi-generation of family home, we divided the self from others. China is going through this now as children leave their multi-generation home to work in factories and businesses in large cities.  Across the world the individual has become more important than the collective, family.

 The disease-of-loneliness is physical, we feel it in the gut, heart, and skin. It is also social. Identifying it is difficult as it is a cluster of effects. It is a complex, hard to read on others unlike anger and sadness (crying), fear, there is no real  indicators of emotions that go with loneliness.  Each person expressing it differently.

Darwinism has been misunderstood by individuals when the survival of the fittest means individual aggrandizement, rather than cooperation. Survival is about adaptation and cooperation within a community, country, and world. Reading the changing manifestation of life from a wholistic point of view produces survival. Perhaps the outgrowth of uneven incomes and life are nothing more than a miss philosophical understanding of Darwinism.

Touch, not sexual touch, but the kind of touch that brings babies and children into the grounding of their body, as taught by Steiner’s anthroposophy is important. Touch connects us. From the time of birth we know this. The baby cries not just to be fed and taken care of but to be touched. It wants to be told it is connected. Every caring mother knows the more a baby is held the happier they are… You can’t spoil a baby by touching it and loving it. The scourge of many of my clients has always been Dr. Spock’s edict to allow the baby to cry. The feelings of rejection and not being loved, the longing for connection starting patterns of separation-of-self for a lifetime. All because good sane women believed Spock rather than their own intuition.

We can detect loneliness by the way an individual interacts with their physical world, addiction to shopping, handling material things more often, sexual  and other activities soon leave us hungry for more. Addictions of all kinds should be looked at as a possible result of not feeling connected in some manner.

It is the sensory experiences that connect us to our community, each other and the world. We recall connections Thru nostalgic music of our teens, scent of perfume, favorite things are all about the recall of a connection in some way to others and our communities. We do this with food. There is a deluge of new-old recipes on the internet helping families to recall happy and connected times around eating. The holidays where families reconnect, it is more than the religion, it is the connections of love and caring, that important first hug that drives us to celebrate.

We are starved for touch not food, for signals from others that we have heard, and known.

We know that intimate touch, not sexual, relieves PSTD and traumatic experiences by overriding the adrenalin of the memory with endorphins thus replacing the pain with comfort. Science shows if this is done enough the painful experience will not be triggered as much in an individual and in fact can override it when the memory is recalled. (See my book Radical Forgiveness for more info in a technique that can accomplish this.)

There is a difference between solitude and loneliness. Like many serious writers I crave long periods of time where my thoughts can flow on paper. Where I am with my mind, my intuition my sense of creator. Like Jesus and Monks, I am not alone but rather with my sense of God. Loneliness is the opposite of this you are without that sense of creative source, God, you feel mortal and disconnected. When I am in solitude I amore connected to the earth, others, my pets, my children than ever before. I am lonely when I can’t find that space in my being that is whole and in touch with all that is existence.

There is no pill that can cure the disease-of-loneliness. Loneliness is far more than an individual mental health problem. Time’s magazine cover in the 70s God Is Dead was wrong. Our sense of God and future has been put behind us in a confusion about the Truth of our state of existence.

For more on touch read Sacred Intimacy click on the books in this site and it will take you to amazon.

© copyright Suzanne Deakins

Intoxicating Lunacy

As Pluto bounces back and forth in the sign of Capricorn the lessons of death and grief are strong and apparent. No one likes thinking of death, but at this time in history we have little choice. As the COVID-19 virus and its emerging symptoms fill hospitals to an over whelming capacity, our trepidations have moved from a general concern to survival thinking.

One of the greatest gifts of humanity is our imaginative brain. Unfortunately, it can also be our curse. While we can envision a future and remember, what we think is our past; It is almost impossible for us to imagine our death and the experience of not existing. However, we can imagine what life might be like after death. Most of us living in the western hemisphere have been filled with the idea of a heaven and hell after death. And because no one, who has been to either, has told us what it is like, at the very least many of us will reside in a state of terror. Many popular programs on Netflix, amazon.com Prime, Hulu are all being based on the idea of an afterlife. As the programs reach for a life, they often display the anxiety of the foreshadowing of death.

We intuitively are affected by what we do not know and in the end what we do not know  causes fear. Because we can’t understand what happens at the moment of death such questions arise such as; where does our soul go; where does our consciousness go? Is it all connected to the body and will we, like Gilgamesh, envisioned our self-laid in the soil of the earth and be eaten by worms?  Is cremation itself the fire-of-hell? It is natural for us to look at life right now and question the very existence of a God or benevolent causer or creator force of some sort. For many Christian’s the phrase “for God So Love the World,” becomes an enigma of Truth at this time. How can an caring, a parental love, desire such harm and destruction?  Are we being punished as a whole world?

We are all contaminated via the collective unconscious mind . When any crisis alerts the collective-of-humanity we all respond. In the case of the COVID-19 virus our response is physical and emotional. Emotions like viruses are contagious. They spread quickly through groups, large and small. Laughter, sadness, love, hate, and fear quickly infect anyone whose unconscious mind is open to  the collective-mind. In this case we have the Contagion of menacing fear… This menacing contagion of fear produces an intoxicating lunacy. Like any addictive emotion we are intoxicated by the endorphins fear releases in our brain. The rush-of-fear has the same affect as orgasm, (and in some cases can produce orgasms), chocolate, alcohol, and mind-altering drugs. The endorphins rush through our brains, and for a short period-of-time our qualms are relaxed and we bask in the feelings. The popularity of scary movies is a good example of how this works.

This contagion causes us to believe we can remove it by blaming someone or something for the virus’s appearance. Sayings such as you are the blame, it is your fault this is happening, pointing to a group or singling out an individual.

This lunacy makes us believe we are above the law-of-nature, that is that we can pray our way out of the virus and our God will protect us. We distrust the science and necessary precautions we have been given. The lunacy of fear has many hoarding and unable to care for their neighbors. Sayings on cars such as, “I care for my freedom more than your health,” point out the lunacy, and the ugly side of our responses to such contagions be they physical or emotional.

I was brought up in the time when I believed that God was my creator and loved me. My prayers, meditations, and Translations did not change the course of nature when my daughter died. When people told me, it was the will of God, I rebelled, hated all life. The question on my mind every hour for a while was; How can there be a God who loves to allow such an evil? Through Translation I came to understand all disease follows the course that nature has created it. The disease that killed my daughter acted in its nature. There was nothing evil or bad about the disease. As all life, it was created whole, complete, and perfect. Like all life. No matter how you believe, it is in the image of the creator source or God. Meaning the nature of God of any religion is one of wholeness and complete. Anyone that creates will tell you that their creations hold a piece of their being.

In my world there is no conflict between science and God or a creator source.  When I was using the Prosperos class Translation, is when I finally got it. Science is perhaps the language in which a creator talks to us. Science tells us that the very first moment of all life was whole, complete, perfect harmony, balance, and beauty. Everything that has existed since that time still has this same paradigm.

No one can tell you how you are to believe and think. You must figure out the mysteries for yourself. No person, dead or alive, can direct your thoughts and understanding. It is only when you embrace your own nature as part of a greater source, a part of the human-collective, will you begin to glimpse and the answer to death.

If we are to believe our eyes and senses death is the end of something and the heart, the breath stops; what then? But no one really knows where our consciousness resides. Socrates like Jesus did not believe in a hell. Nowhere does Jesus talk of non-believers residing in a fiery hell. Both believed that breath ended as we normally think of it. I know that in most religions throughout the world this same scenario appears; life after death of some sort, but no hell, nothing that is known by mortal continuation.

We will continue to fear death, be intoxicated by the rush of possibility, act drunk in the face of adversity, perhaps curse our sense of God. In my experience of death is that in its last moment is often peaceful and one to the submission to the law-of-nature, and accepting of science. Of hell we should have no fear…

© 2020 Suzanne Deakins





















And The People Stayed At Home

And the People Stayed Home – Poem by Kitty O’Meara

And the people stayed home.
And read books and listened, and rested and exercised,
and made art and played games,
and learned new ways of being and were still.
And listened more deeply.
Some meditated, some prayed, some danced.
Some met their shadows.
And the people began to think differently.

And the people healed.
And, in the absence of people living in ignorant, dangerous, mindless and heartless ways the earth began to heal.

And when the danger passed, and the people joined together again,
they grieved their losses, and made new choices,
and dreamed new images,
and created new ways to live and heal the earth fully,
as they had been healed.

Isolation Blues


The longer we have to self-isolate, or keep distance from one another, our need for contact increases. From the moment of conception, we are with someone else, with another being. For most of us, our very being is one of wanting communication of some nature. We long for touch and/or words.

It is our nature to want reassurance that we are needed and heard in some manner. A baby cries not just because it needs physical care. But it needs reassurance through touch and facial expression that it is wanted and recognized. Closeness, physically, satisfies us in many ways. We feel the energy of another, the smell of their essence, and feel of animated life. When seniors are isolated, they tend to want pets for this very reason. The saying is we are rescued by pets, rings true to our inner being.

We feel stuck in our homes, caught in a traffic jam in our minds, emotional arid, and feeling our souls are slipping away. For most of us these emotions come and go. In a morning filled with sun and having a good night’s sleep we find joy in those first minutes and hours. As the day slowly moves forward the aloneness invades our thoughts. And as we did as children we reach for comfort of some sort, some kind of touch-stone to reassure ourselves we are alive, wanted, and needed.

There is no immediate cure for these blues, but you can help your self by focusing on ideas that make you feel well:

 1) Exercising your body, movement of any kind triggers the endorphins in the brain, and consequently for a bit the emptiness will disappear.

2) Eat healthy, sugar and simple carbs lower your immune system. Knowing you are helping your body stay healthy gives a sense of control over your life. The loss of a feeling of control or not having control triggers the rebellious teenager we all carry within. Regaining some of the control of your life doesn’t mean ignoring safety rules and science during this time. Find activities that fill your idea of control in your life.

3) Hold onto small victories. One day-at-a-time state of mind helps you move forward. A meaningful or purposeful project that you can participate in might help. Or perhaps volunteering to help another. When we work an identity of who we are and our part in life is formed. The loss of identity be it loss of a loved one, a friend, a job, et. all cause us grief; deep grief that drains us making us tired and often depressed.

4) Establish a different identity one that is not based on passing events and happenings but one that forms a lasting legacy of who you are. This is done by finding purpose and identity beyond our human state of existence. Get involved with something that is outside of your current beliefs of existence.

Look for The Prosperos classes on topics that take you into areas you have not fully explored, if you have taken classes from The Prosperos take a repeat, email me, or visit The Prosperos many meetings. You can sign up for the Bathtub Bulletin (its free and fun) for timely updates on activities local and worldwide. Write me at onespiritpress@gmail.com  for local activities in Oregon. We are going to start a free zoom talk (topics are around this extraordinary time in our life times) hour on March 11, 2020. Email me if you wish to participate. It will begin at 5:30 PM  Pacific Time

Suzanne Deakins  © copyright 2020