The Big Give-For

In 1969 I went through unimaginable pain. Emotional pain. I lost custody of my three older children. Not because I was an unfit mother, but because I thought the world was fair and that others would see truth as I saw it. My naiveté allowed me to believe in the myth that what I saw as good always wins.

Filled with anger and grief I began the long journey of finding out who I was and why I was a victim. My identity was based on my motherhood, stripped of that I found myself wondering the wilderness of mind, looking, and seeking answers.

I learned through the Prospero’s class called Releasing the Hidden Splendour (RHS), to release the anger and grief and give up the identity of victim. Like all self-discovery it took more than one year or perhaps one lifetime to come to terms with who I was at the core of my being.

In my work I found that I was angry with my children (and their father) for abandoning me, or so it felt like. My parents were also targets of my anger and pain. However, it was not until 1984 that the full impact of the idea of victim came to be the center of my attention. My daughter died from a horrendous disease, quickly and unexpectedly. Once again I found myself angry and in pain. I was a victim without recourse. I needed to know why once again I had been abandoned.

My self-work intensified. At the depth of my soul I wanted retribution for the pain and anger I felt. Using the tools of RHS once more I came to some astonishing insights.

Somehow like many others I had felt that I could change the past. I understood consciousness and taught it. I felt it was malleable and would reform the memories as I gave up the anger and pain. But we can’t and don’t change the past. We change how we relate to it. Unless we are willing to let go of our old relationships to memories, deeds, and emotions we will continue to relate in the same manner.

To give up all relationships and how we relate to memories is to give-for or forgive. In other words we cannot forgive because the past remains the same. But if we change how we relate we can forgive.

Forgiveness is a gift. No one can give you the power of forgiveness; no one can take the power of forgiveness from you. Forgiveness is yours to give. Forgiveness takes no other participant but you.

Forgiveness, giving up old walls that lock us into past resentments, anger, and pain, is self-healing. We heal from our emotional and physical wounds in ways that we never understood. We are liberated from our pain and bitterness; liberated from being a victim of our own consciousness. We become self empowered.

All victims feel hopeless and powerless. We instinctively know we cannot change our past circumstances only how we relate to it. When we release the pain we step into a realm of unlimited consciousness, into areas of life we could not know existed because of the emotional walls we built around our self, trying to survive and protect our feeling of powerlessness.

If you have ever been a victim, are angry, resentful, and searching contact me at suzannedeakins@gmail.com for seminars in your area of the world or get in touch with http://www.theprosperos.org for a list of seminars and teaching Mentors in your region.

© Suzanne Deakins from Radical Forgiveness available on amazon.com

Healing Our Community and Country

Healing Our Community and Country

This is being written before the election. By the time you read this the election outcome will have been decided. No matter how we voted it does not matter. A nation is not healed because of its leaders. What is going to heal us as a nation is not more rhetoric, but an outrages idea of compassion and love.

Nothing we do, study, meditate, pray, or Translate has any meaning unless we take what we have learned about love to another level. This is more than loving your brother or sister; this is about infusing our consciousness with love and compassion to the extent that our leaders can lead with love.

It doesn’t matter what party you belong to, or who you voted for. What matters is that you have the courage to stand up and ask for a leadership, which is based on love and compassion for the citizens of our country. This is a risk, because you will be going against the very grain of what many think this country needs.

We have allowed our minds to be captive to those who would tell us we will be happy if we have more jobs, more money, more, more, and more. What ails this country has nothing to do with the economics it has to do with us allowing our minds to be captive to greed and prejudice. We have allowed our thinking to be void of purpose and meaning that comes through love and compassion. The fear and angst is generated by an apparent vision that democracy is failing. The emotional state (fear of loosing control and power) of a country and communities is not small idea. It causes rebellions, violence, and destruction. We need to do something about the level of inequality in this country. This is not about socialism or communism but about making a kind of capitalism that also works for people at the bottom end of society.

As a country and a group we must reconcile what we feel is right with the agenda of those who are elected. To regain a sense of control and power we will need our governments, local and nationally, to show us that the citizens, the nation, and communities well being are foremost in the agendas. We must see them reconcile the divisiveness with reality. As individuals we can reclaim our sense of power and control by joining local groups that are facing issues such as inequality in income and housing and unjust laws. When we feel we are effective in our efforts we become empowered and our stress and fear levels drop. We can facilitate reconciliation between ideas and dogmas by showing compassion and listening to others with as little prejudice as we can muster.

I purpose we stand up and take our neighbors hand, standing together we let others know we are willing to take the risk, to be courageous. We don’t need to shout, “I am not going to take it any more.” We need to say I love you, and I carry you in my heart. We say it to our neighbors and our leaders, until they hear us. We say it the morning and the evening and on the mountains and in the valleys. We say it until we break the chains of fear and greed. We say it until every child is loved, feed, and free to find joy. We say it until every person is free of the shackles of fear aggression drives. We say it until no mind, no leader, no country can resist the nature of reality, Love/Truth.

Only in this is there ever a healing. The divisiveness of this electoral season has driven us to a new level of stress and worry. It is only through compassion and love that we will heal. Victor Frankle a noted psychologist, who survived the holocaust, found that those who survived and were able to create a life after the concentration camps were those who could relate to loving someone, or an ideal greater than their ego or the need to be right. In this they found purpose.

There are no right or wrong paths in life. Only when we embrace something greater than our own ego and greed are we healed. It is only when we no longer swallow the bitter pills and infuse our very soul with love and compassion that any of us ever heal.

Say it, say it to one another… Say you love each other, say it to me. Write it on your forehead, write it in your mind, in the sand of the shore, shout it to the mountains, sing it in the valleys until every person in our community, outside of community, state, nation, and world knows it to be so that we are a community of love and compassion.

 

Suzanne’s new book When God Whispers is now available on amazon.com

 

 

Thank You for My Clubfoot

In reading Somerset Maugham’s “Of Human Bondage.” And was struck by a passage where the protagonist Phillip, is confronted by his Headmaster to give thanks for his clubfoot rath­er than bemoaning it. The Headmaster goes on to point out that this unique circumstance in his life presents the opportunity to learn what no one else has the opportunity to know.

Rarely do we think about giving thanks for the adversary in our life. We are quick to thank for the bounty and good will but often withhold any thanks about the rest. It is natural to feel we are somewhat being punished when we experi­ence ill fortune of any kind.

We don’t seem to grow in our consciousness when things are going smooth; it often takes an upset to shift us into exploring what is residing in our consciousness. The simple act of grati­tude, for the opportunity to learn and grow, sets us on a different track. We find we are no longer on the railroad of victimhood. Out of the den­sity of thought and ill winds blows a fresh new start in our perspective about life.

We often don’t have control or conscious choice over many things in our life. But we do have choice about our perception and actions toward the events that unfold before us. How we view an incident is our decision. We have the right and ability to choose our reactions and how we live. No government, no philosophical viewpoint can take away our ability to be cog­nizant of life. Only when we recognize that the broken arm is as much Truth/God as the whole arm are we free to change our perspective and have real control of life.

God/Truth is as much a part of what we call ill circumstances as of the beauty and bounty of life. We can’t say that God/Truth is all there is but the illness or death. For if something is all it is, it is all there is without beginning or end. It is our choice in how we see the actions and how we react.

When we surrender to Truth/God being all there is, we surrender the seeming human need to divide our creation into two, good or bad. In surrendering and giving thanks for all there is, no matter what the appearance in our life, we are freed from thinking we have no real control. Our control does not reside in the circumstances of our perception, but rather our ability to con­ceive that God/Truth is all there is and every­thing else is a flight of our imagination.

Your gratitude is not about giving thanks for the death and destruction now occurring on our world. It is for the opportunity to learn, grow, and become intimate with the idea that Truth is all there is.

© 2005-2018 Suzanne Deakins                                                                                              from When God Whispers available on amazon.com onespiritpress@gmail.com